Do you happen to work with a dominating colleague who always wants to run the show and get his way by taking over all situations?
Or, do you have a manipulative boss who wants to control every aspect of your work from what and when you do to how you do it, even to the extent of bulldozing you?
Yes. You are then saddled with an obnoxious control freak who is overwhelmingly dominating and interfering. He leaves you with no choice as he always insists on calling all the shots and if you are not looking, may just take over your whole life!
Needless to say, it is difficult to work with a control freak on a daily basis. Not only does he make your life exhausting and stressful but can also affect the quality of your work.
While you cannot let such a person run your life, you do have to find ways to work with him.
Here are a few tips on the same:
The oldest and simplest rule is to not give him control over you in the first place. Read the warning signs of arrogance and superiority and try to maintain a distance from the start. While this may appear quite difficult, what you should do is step around his controlling actions and carry on with your work.
The control freak will try every trick in the book to dominate your work and use you as a puppet. If you lash out in return or get agitated like him, it will only give him more power over you. What you should do is stay calm and focussed in spite of the tension. Even if you feel intimidated or threatened, do not reveal that the actions are affecting you – he will be stupefied and have no choice but to give up soon. Arguing with a control freak is a complete waste of time, as he will continue to bicker to no end until you give in and he has his way. Challenging him comes with its own set of risks, as he will never be open to any sort of negotiation. Instead, a simple trick is to just pretend to agree with him on especially the small things (particularly if he is the boss).
Realise that all he wants is to be heard. You have to be kind and patient as you hear out everything that he has to say and it’s half the battle won!
Do not forget to show that you are considering what he has said and value his opinion so that he feels acknowledged.While you may have to give in a bit just to keep the peace, always stand your ground. You should know when to say ‘no’.
While the control freak will always try to control the agenda, you can attempt to subtly direct him to decisions and conclusions, but without ever letting him realise what you are upto.
Step back and let him hog the limelight while you shrewdly lead him around to your way of thinking.
In spite of everything, it is easy to start feeling humiliated and incapable around a control freak. The constant domination can hit your self-esteem making you feel degraded and worthless.
You have to protect yourself by remembering that the controlling actions actually stem from his hidden fears, anger and insecurities.
He is actually terrified of failure and is trying to control others just to protect himself.
All you need is lots of self-control and you can soon restore your control over both your life and work!
PAYAL CHANANIA
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